I was reading a book by Geneen Roth the other day (Lost and Found) and near the end of the book she said something that I found really resonated not only with myself but also with a lot of people who struggle in different ways in their lives. She said “ Nothing has the power to diminish me except the story I am telling myself, the play I am creating in my own mind.”
I think it’s important to look at this quote and see how it applies to you. As with many of the issues we struggle with, but definitely with regards to disordered eating, we can often become victims to our own story. I hear so many people come in convinced that recovery or healing is an impossible journey and something that is bigger than them. If we make this our story how likely will it be that we are able to recover or overcome any obstacle we may face? The hardest part of our work can then be about changing their story so that they can believe that they really can be well. None of this is to imply that recovery is easy, or that we should just think we are fine and Poof! We will be. Rather I am encouraging you to look at the own story you are creating about your struggle with food and ask yourself who you want to be playing the leading role: You or your disorder? It takes a lot of courage to change our stories and yet at the end of the day keeping our story the same will keep getting us the same results, changing it means we create hope (if nothing else) that things can be different.
So take a few minutes to really sit with this quote and see how it applies to you. What is the story you are telling yourself about your recovery? How is it helping or harming you? How can you change one part of it so that you feel like the story becomes your own? Be kind to yourself through this process. It isn’t expected that you jump from telling yourself recovery is impossible to saying recovery is easy, but maybe you change your story to recovery being possible today. This is about making small changes so that the big picture can be shifted, bit by bit, to reflect not only what you want it to look like but also who you really are (not what you struggle with).
Each and every day you have a choice – are you going to diminish yourself today or empower yourself?