I think one of the most important skills we can learn in life is how to set boundaries and that one of the biggest gifts we can give ourselves is setting boundaries when we need to. In the recovery process there will be lots of people who will want you to get well. How their eagerness and support can come across however is not always in ways that support your ultimate well being. Let me be clear on this before I continue, when I say your ultimate well being I don’t mean the well being of your eating disorder, I mean the well being of you as a human being who is working on recovery.
Frequently people will offer advice or say things with the best of intentions but that can leave you feeling triggered and overwhelmed. Perhaps they purchase food for you without you asking, or maybe they comment on your body in a way that sends your eating disorder on a power trip. Whatever it is, it is important to recognize their intentions (usually good) while also acknowledging the impact it has on you (sometimes bad).
If there is somebody who tries to support you in ways that are harmful to your recovery journey I would encourage you to set a healthy boundary. It doesn’t have to be aggressive but sometimes being assertive will allow the person to see that you mean it when you say no. So how does this look? Setting a boundary is about being really clear about what is helpful and what is harmful. No is allowed to mean no and the more you honour that within yourself the easier your recovery will be. If there is an area in particular that you are struggling and you want some help on how to set a healthy, respectful boundary with someone send me an email or write it in the comment section below. Together we can find the words that help move you forward with your loved ones supporting you in a way that you find helpful.